When someone you know dies you suffer loss. You go through stages of grief. Most people tell you to seek counseling and it’s probably a good idea. Unfortunately, you just aren't ready to hear what they are saying. I'm thinking it's one of the stages of grief. The level of grief we suffer generally is based on the closeness of the relationship with the one who has passed on.It's interesting in society how we all know that when someone dies we will experience grief. Thereby, everyone logically expects some sort of grief loss after the death of a family member or friend. When death occurs because of sudden illness, accident or tragedy we are generally placed in some sort of shock prior to going through the stages of grief. Yet, logically we begin to realize that we are going through stages of grief and accept that is the way it is.
What about those who have a family member or friend suffering from a long term illness? In some instances, these family members have been going through this for so long they are almost relieved when their loved one passes, like they have been freed from the pain and suffering and are finally at peace. In those instances, the individuals probably have received some type of grieve counseling during this process. Other times the individuals are not prepared for the actual death because they have been involved in the dying phase for so long it's been nothing but a roller coaster. Perhaps, the patient it getting better then takes a turn for the worse and this process repeats for months, sometimes years. These individuals are so heavily invested in the day to day they haven't found counseling for themselves. It's those who are inundated with the day to day of someone's illness they haven't had a chance to seek counseling or get any help for their grief so when the end comes it's overwhelming.
While it’s hard to take time out for ourselves, especially when someone is dying right before our eyes, it's important. We need to have some down time. A chance to process our own feelings. A chance to eat, sleep and recharge. A chance to pray. A chance to simply breathe. This does not make you a bad person; it just makes you a person. It's ok to grieve.
This is a great site to help you with stages and information of grief:
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